fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
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