i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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