Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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