and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
