Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Randomize