have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Randomize