saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Im just a social blackout drinker.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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