K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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