Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize
