Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
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