I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
