um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
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