I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
