Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
People in love make me want to vomit
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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