I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
the condom got lost in my hair
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
