Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
