Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(612): View more from Minnesota

So do you want to come over? ;)

(763): View more from Minnesota

Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.

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(561): View more from Florida

i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?

(1-814): View more from Pennsylvania

I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.

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(318): View more from Louisiana

why is allison so mad at me??

(469): View more from Texas

me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".

(318): View more from Louisiana

crap..

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(806): View more from Texas

We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.

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(773): View more from Illinois

Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like

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(323): View more from California

There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream

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(425): View more from Washington

Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys

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