All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Randomize
