btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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