lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Randomize
