weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
