all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
