Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
