last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
i need some magic done to my vagina
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
