Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
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