So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
