my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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