THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
ttyl tear gas
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
