Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
