She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize
