it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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