I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
