Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Boobs speak an international language.
NoShamevember. You game?
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
