i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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