Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Randomize
