Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Randomize
