guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Randomize
