he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Damn victory sex feels great
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Randomize