I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize