well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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