all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
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