oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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