he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Randomize
