I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
