with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Thanks for jumping on that grenade for me last night. You're the best wingman ever
She ate 7 of the 8 slices of pizza. I deserve a purple heart and sex w your sister
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
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