can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
