I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Randomize
