porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Randomize