is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize
