Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
