I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Randomize
